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The Road to the Final Loon: SZN II

That’s right, the March Madness bracket competition that electrified fans across the Loon State has been cleared for a second season. Which Loon knows the most ball? Read ahead in this preview, and stay tuned for updates throughout the tournament to find out.

LoonMush

Champion: Alabama (1) 

Final Four: Alabama (1), Marquette (2), Xavier (3), Kansas (1)

We start with last year’s champion and our resident college basketball expert, LoonMush. Despite a first round filled with swings and misses on greasy upset picks, Mush recovered with a strong Final Four and a correct champion pick in Kansas to take the 2022 competition. This year, he’s calmed down a bit on the upsets in the first weekend, though he does have 13-seed Furman making a Sweet Sixteen appearance. And he loves Kansas again, taking them all the way to the championship game where he has them losing to the volume shooters of Alabama. If 3-seed Xavier makes a Final Four run out of the Big East, Mush will be raking in the points, as he’s the only Loon with them even making the Elite Eight. This could be a legacy bracket for Mush as a repeat victory could begin the Road to the Final Loon dynasty talk.

SlimLoon

Champion: Texas (2)

Final Four: Alabama (1), Texas (2), UCONN (4), Purdue (1)

We continue with our other college basketball “expert,” SlimLoon, who sneaky embarrassed himself in the inaugural Road to the Final Loon. Slim came in dead last, and in the 16th percentile overall, mostly because his champion lost in the first round and he didn’t pick a single Elite Eight team correctly. This year, though, may be different. He’s off of Kentucky and in on Texas, for good reason, too. His inclusion of UCONN in the Final Four stands out though, as he’s got the Huskies taking down tournament overall #3 seed Kansas and the TCU Horned Frogs taking care of a dangerous UCLA team in that region. Slim also has Furman making the second weekend, which has me thinking that the small town Minnesota boys might be cooking up some collusion. Either way, SlimLoon needs a big tournament this year to make up for his mess of a 2022.

LoonBeast

Champion: Alabama (1)

Final Four: Alabama (1), Houston (1), Duke (5), UCLA (2)

After a pretty chalky bracket in 2022, LoonBeast has gotten a lot more creative in 2023, probably this guy just sits on his ass at work and has plenty of time to think. LoonBeast’s bracket features second weekend appearances from 12-seeds College of Charleston and Drake (who will for sure lose to my beloved Canes) and he’s got 10-seed USC making an Elite Eight run. He settles it down a little in the later rounds though, with a couple one seeds, a two, and a popular five-seed in Duke making the trip to Houston. His championship game between Houston and Alabama would be an excellent matchup to watch from a talent and play style perspective, especially if Marcus Sasser’s crotch is in good shape by then. LoonBeast, though, is going to shoot his shot with the Crimson Tide to cut down the nets.

LoonMagz

Champion: Alabama (1)

Final Four: Alabama (1), Houston (1), Marquette (2), UCONN (4)

You know, just to keep it interesting, we have another Loon targeting Alabama to win the National Title; this time it’s LoonMagz. He shares a championship game pick with LoonBeast as they both have ‘Bama and Houston, and they both prefer the trigger happy offense of the Crimson Tide to prevail. As for the rest of the bracket, Magz has kept it pretty balanced between high profile teams doing well and some popular upset picks. Most interestingly, though, he has 14-seeds UC Santa Barbara and Kennesaw State winning a game. The Kennesaw State-Xavier first round matchup will be huge for the LoonMush/LoonMagz rivalry as Magz will be pulling hard against Mush’s Final Four team. I’ll have it noted that the first time Magz submitted his bracket, he hadn’t picked a winner between #4 Tennessee and #13 Louisiana, so his pick of the Vols there is not a confident one. 

LoonSchmidt

Champion: Arizona (2)

Final Four: Arizona (2), Texas (2), Purdue (1), UCLA (2)

LoonSchmidt, who’s coming off a strong second-place finish in Road to the Final Loon I, is picking Arizona to cut down the nets in Houston, which is weird because a Pac-12 team hasn’t won the National Championship since 1997, when LoonSchmidt was nothing more than a twinkle in LoonSusan’s eye. Anyway, I’m sure there’s no bias behind him choosing the Cats, though he is the only Loon picking them to go to the Final Four. The rest of us have them getting shot down by Bama in the Elite Eight. In the rest of the bracket, LoonSchmidt keeps it very chalky, with no teams higher than a 10 seed even winning a game. He does have the Canes of Miami taking down mighty Houston to make an Elite Eight appearance, which I personally love.

Intern Allen

Champion: Texas (2)

Final Four: Alabama (1), Texas (2), Marquette (2), Kansas (1)

As you may have gathered, I’ve been a lifelong Miami sports fan since I showed up here about six months ago. And this year, I love the Canes so much that I have them losing to a much more talented Houston team in the Sweet Sixteen. Elsewhere, I’ve kept it pretty simple with a lot of the highest-ranked teams making a deep run into the tournament. Usually the teams that are the best beat the teams that are not the best. I think Alabama, Texas, and Kansas are the best teams in the tournament so I spent a good amount of time sitting over the Texas/Kansas Final Four matchup and the National Championship decision between Bama and Texas. Ultimately, I saw what Texas did to Kansas in the Big 12 tournament, and it will be just a wrong place, wrong time situation for Bama against the talented backcourt and depth of the Longhorns. 

Stay tuned throughout the Tournament to see which Loon knows the most ball!

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